The first car I ever crashed was a Lotus Esprit. Rounding a corner too quickly, it flipped onto its side, bounced between the bannisters, then cartwheeled down the stairs.
The Matchbox model in question was ‘Wet Nellie’, James Bond’s submarine supercar from The Spy Who Loved Me. Fittingly, I think it ended up submerged in our garden pond.
My next encounter with the Esprit came as a teenager. I wasted countless hours wiggling my joystick (not a euphemism) playing Lotus Esprit Turbo Challenge on the Commodore Amiga.
Several decades later, I was finally been invited to drive a real one. Needless to say, I kept well away from ponds. And, um, stairs.Â
Red wedge
Launched in 1976, the Esprit was assembled in Norfolk for some 28 years, finally bowing out in 2004. There were rumours that Lotus, now owned by Chinese carmaker Geely, would bring back the Esprit name for an electric sports car to sit above the Emira, although don’t hold your breath.
The car I’m experiencing today is a 1983 Esprit S3 (Series 3), resplendent in red with gold deep-dish alloys and white-lettered tyres. It’s cooler than Roger Moore’s arched eyebrow.
It looks even better in the metal, too: a low-slung wedge of sharp creases and aggressive angles. Except the Lotus isn’t made of metal: its body panels are fibreglass, hung on a galvanised steel frame. There are two seats, fully independent suspension and a mid-mounted engine, but not everything is quite so exotic.
That motor only musters four cylinders, the tail lights come from a Rover SD1 and the cabin is awash with Morris Marina switchgear.
A little bit Moore
Despite the parts-bin pilfering, the Esprit still feels special from behind its two-spoke steering wheel. The hammock-like seats are so laid-back you’re almost lying down, while the wraparound instrument pod looks futuristic (or certainly did in the early 1980s).
It’s surprisingly luxurious, with plush leather swathing every surface: a stark contrast to the stripped-out Lotus vibe of today. Oh, and the choke lever – a metal tab on the centre console – doubled up as the cement sprayer in 007’s car. I’m already sold.
On the move, the Esprit is initially less convincing. Its five-speed manual gearbox needs a weighty shove when cold and the throttle and brake pedals are perilously close together.
The 2.2-litre engine also sounds rather prosaic, even as the revs rise. It never howls like a Porsche flat-six or wails like a Ferrari V8. Plus, its performance won’t trouble a modern hot hatch: 162hp at a buzzy 7,000rpm means 0-62mph in 6.9 seconds and 139mph flat-out.
Use the Force
Straight-line speed has never been this car’s forte, though. It comes alive on flowing B-roads, with the beautifully wrought balance that Lotus is famous for. The steering is nuanced and precise, the brakes are better than most cars of this era, and turn-in feels firm and focused.
The Esprit’s modest dimensions are a real boon, too. Smaller than a new Emira, it darts down hedge-lined lanes where newer, vastly wider supercars would fear to tread.
The Esprit, then, is still a proper driver’s car. With my backside inches from the ground and scarcely any sense of inertia, it feels like piloting a Star Wars speeder – another toy that littered my bedroom floor in 1983. Yet removing my rose-tinted spectacles for a moment, it’s also a surefire money-pit that will demand constant attention to keep sweet. We all know the ‘Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious’ acronym, right?
Many thanks to RNG Classics in Reigate, Surrey, for the Lotus loan. This car has since left the fleet, so consider hiring their Ferrari 308 GTS – one of the Esprit’s contemporary rivals, reviewed here – instead.
PRICE: From £25,000
0-62MPH: 6.9sec
TOP SPEED: 138mph
CO2 EMISSIONS: N/A
FUEL ECONOMY: 23.5mpg
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